Well, those two crazy kids actually went and got themselves married. This Saturday, Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes were joined in holy matrimony at Odescalchi Castle outside of Rome. There were over 150 guests in attendance, including Victoria Beckham, Brooke Shields, Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony, Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith, and Jenny McCarthy and Jim Carrey.
Katie's father escorted her down the aisle, and the ceremony was performed at sunset by a Scientology minister (read about traditional Scientology wedding vows here). The wedding party included Cruise's children, Isabella and Connor, and the best man was Cruise's best friend, David Miscavige, who also happens to be the head of the Church of Scientology. Katie's sister, Nancy Blaylock, was her matron of honor. The wedding singer was Matt Lauer. Nah, I'm kidding, it was Andrea Bocelli. I hear there was a light drizzle at the start of the ceremony, but then things cleared up for the couple.
Since I honestly don't understand enough of these words to paraphrase the description of what Katie wore, I am going to jack it, word for tedious word, from Us Weekly: "Katie wore a fitted Armani off-the-shoulder bridal gown with a train in ivory silk cadis adorned in Valenciennes lace and Swarovski beaded crystal embroidery, featuring a delicate crinoline frill at the shoulders and a silk soleil border around the hem. The gown was complemented by an ivory tulle floor length veil and ivory silk shoes." If this sounds more like a recipe for a wedding cake to you, too, just check out the pics. For the rest of you fashionistas, People has a run-down of what the entire wedding party wore (summary: everyone's in Armani). Need more pictures? TMZ has one billion, and Teddy and Moo has the rest.
Tom and Katie left early the next morning for their honeymoon in the Maldives. Where are the Maldives? Apparently they're an island nation south-west of Sri Lanka. Where is Sri Lanka? Now you're on your own.