Britney and Kevin Getting Back Together????

Britney Spears was spotted leaving an AA meeting wearing her wedding ring which has led many to speculate that perhaps Kevin and her are heading towards a reconciliation. Kevin has been a visitor to Promises in Malibu where Britney is in rehab. Since Britney's decent into crazy, Kevin has been taking care of his babies and also has been a stand-up guy not speaking with the media or attacking Britney's behavior.

Though I think that his silence might be financially motivated, Kevin really has come out of all of this as a good guy. I honestly think that Kevin loves Britney and probably is very frightened by her behavior. Though Britney had some fashionable clothing choices while dating K-Fed it looks like her crazy wasn't caused by Kevin. Perhaps Kevin actually kept her in check of a while.

Though I might kick myself for saying this...I think it is a good idea for these two to get back together, take care of their kids and *gasp* act like actual responsible adults.

BritneyGate Never Sleeps

On tomorrow's docket? Brit Spears losing the kids? Maybe.

From our friends at the tiny news gathering called The Associated Press:

"(AP) -- As Britney Spears was reportedly checking out of a drug rehabilitation center for the second time in a week, her estranged husband was making plans to go to court amid a custody dispute over their two children.

Kevin Federline and his lawyer were scheduled to appear at a downtown courthouse Thursday for an emergency hearing, Superior Court spokesman Allan Parachini told The Associated Press.

"Our best information is he will be here; she won't," said Parachini. "But anything is possible."

Yes, anything is possible. Brit could parachute in from an Army helicopter. She could show up selling her extra needles. The kids may have already been sold to Madonna.

There is no limit to the crazy train, just hop on board and pray the dining car opens soon.

Brit's Late-Night Vomit-rama

Not that this is even news anymore, but Britney was parting at NYC's Tenjune late Saturday night -- maybe partying a little too much. Britster exited the club and was rushed into an SUV with a blonde female friend. When she arrived at the hotel, she and the friend left, and the paps quickly noticed something was amiss within the car. They zoom in and get a close-up of the backseat of the SUV, covered in vomit. That's hot. Video here.

Brit's former love, Justin Timberlake, had a similar night on Friday. After performing at Avalon on Friday night (and giving K-Fed a hug on the red carpet -- is there a Federlake in the works?), JT was scheduled to perform at Clive Davis' legendary pre-Grammy bash on Saturday, but had to cancel, citing a 103 degree fever. The folks who were out partying with Justin until five o'clock Saturday morning said he seemed perfectly healthy -- albeit drunk -- to them. Hm. Fox News said the newly single pop star actually showed up for sound check, but just couldn't pull it together to perform.

Maybe next time Justin should think twice before sounding off about what an irresponsible trainwreck Britney is.

Adventures in Brand Management: An Open Invitation to Kevin Federline

While much of the fast-food industry has criticized K-Fed for his upcoming Super Bowl commercial, Taco Bell has taken a different -- and much smarter -- tack.


Dear Mr. Federline,

First off, congratulations on your upcoming Super Bowl ad. We heard it's generating a lot of talk, particularly about working in the fast food industry.

We know you respect those who work in our business. In fact, last year you said in an interview, "My kids are going to have to learn what a real job is, what life is. You don't have it easy with me. Period. My kids are going to work at Taco Bell."

We're flattered, but obviously they're too young to work for us. So here's our offer to you: Come work for us, just for a one hour shift. We'll get you a uniform, a custom name tag and show you what a great place Taco Bell is to work. We'll even reward customers who visit that restaurant with an order of our new Carne Asada Steak Grilled Taquitos for free.

We encourage you to continue to "Think Outside the Bun" and hope you accept our tasty offer.

Sincerely,
Greg Creed
President
Taco Bell Corp.

Update: Too funny. Yum! Brands stock (they own Taco Bell) is up a point to a 5-day high this afternoon.

Kevin Federline: Good Guy or Brilliant Negotiator?

Britney Spears offered Kevin Federline a cool $25 mil to get out of her -- and her children's -- lives for good, and he's turned it down. Depending on whom you believe, this is either because he's holding out for $50M or because he actually refuses to make a graceful exit from the lives of their children. Says one source: "He loves his two little boys, and there's no way he's going to disappear from their lives." Both parties are asking for sole custody of the kids.

Federline has proven that he can make his own income. He recently filmed a Super Bowl commercial for Nationwide Insurance and has reportedly fielded offers to do a number of reality TV shows. Of course this is not a particularly sustainable business model, but he certainly has at least another year or two of pseudo-stardom. If he invests well, he can probably swear off back-up dancing for the rest of his life, with or without Britney's money. And who the hell knows? Maybe, in this process, he'll rehabilitate his image to the point where he can build some manner of non-laughable career as an entertainment figure. I mean, if Screech is still famous, there's no limit to Kevin Federline's potential.

The Kevin Federline Super Bowl Commercial

Good move, Nationwide Insurance.

Late-Night Links

Nicole Kidman is carted off to the hospital after an on-set car accident, but she's so badass she comes back later in the night to resume filming. Thankfully, someone got the accident on tape. [Celebslam]

Jessica's pouty expressions and hair-twirling may be more for the camera than for John Mayer. [Cele|bitchy]

Kate and Owen take another shot at their non-relationship. You know, for the sake of the little Ryder. Oh wait. [Celeb Warship]

Pics of Carrie Underwood shooting her new music video. [Celebrity Smack]

Wrap your head around this: Paul Reubens, incapable of draw the line at masturbating in a public place, also smoked cigarettes on set. [Defamer]

Black Snake Moan is characterized as "bad Ricci-porn." Count me in! [Pajiba]

Even fast food employees are loathe to be associated with Kevin Federline. [Agent Bedhead]

Late-Night Links

Those folks who took over Paris Hilton's storage locker when she forgot to pay the monthly fee on it have finally released the info they found within. Among it: pictures of Paris smoking a tampon. [Gawker]

Rose McGowan's looking a little ragged these days. [popbytes]

Jen Aniston's rep is just plain tired of lying. He admits his client had a nose job this weekend. [The Superficial]

Singer Brandy was the cause of a disturbing Los Angeles wreck. No, not Moesha. [Bossip]

Look, I tried, but I can't beat Seth and Mark on this, so I'm just going to steal their headline: ABC Sends Isaiah Washington to Gayhab. [Defamer]

Clearly the most effective way to get your estranged wife to seek help for her drinking problem is to whine about it to Star magazine. Right, K-Fed? [IBBB]

Hugh Hefner takes time out of his busy day to call Kelly Osbourne ugly. [Agent Bedhead]

Late-Night Links

Howard Stern gets David Arquette to dish on the Brad/Jen split. [INO]

Kate Moss may be a hopeless cocaine addict, but she's an addict who can sell some clothes. Burberry knows this. [Celeb Warship]

Trust me, if the Kim Kardashian sex tape exists, no one wants it to hit the Internet more than Kim Kardashian. [Bossip]

Father of the Year Kevin Federline announces that the forfeit of his relationship with Sean and Jayden is worth $25M per kid. [The Blemish]

A pregnant Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott hit the press junkets. [Teddy and Moo]

Justin Timberlake takes his face out of Scarlett's breasts for long enough to issue a formal break-up statement with Cameron Diaz. [Faded Youth]

Spicy Pants from Celebrity Smack is going to be on the radio! Be sure to tune in and listen. [Celebrity Smack]

MK from popbytes has 30 Seconds to Blog for an AOL webcast and he does a fantastic job. [popbytes]

It Turns Out Britney Remembers She Has Children

Or at least her lawyers did.

Britney and K-Fed agreed to a temporary custody arrangement for the month of January. While it's been said (by celebrity gossip bloggers, who, like myself, all have J.D.s and a minimum of five years experience practicing divorce law) that Britney's wild ways, when contrasted with Federline's recent campaign for Father of the Year, would result in a custody settlement that favors the Fed-Ex, that doesn't seem to be the case so far.

Federline got his ass whooped in the arrangement. Well, I mean, he got his ass whooped if you start with the assumption that he wasn't actually hoping for a court-mandated excuse to rarely have to bother being around his children. According to the agreement, Federline can spend the hours of noon to four on Monday, Wednesday and Friday with his children, at Spears' home. Spears is allowed to be present. Spears is also allowed to take the children to Miami for a week, starting today.

Britney, who recently admitted to being "far from perfect" in a letter to fans on her website, and Kevin have yet to determine a final custody agreement.

Late-Night Links

Paris Hilton actually managed to get fired from her namesake Club Paris. Is there anything this girl can't do? [The Blemish]

Pics from the Alpha Dog premiere's after-party, with nary a Cameron Diaz in sight. [Monica Monroe]

K-Fed gets text-dissed by La Lohan. [The Superficial]

Britney Spears is back on the party scene, looking worse than I have ever, ever seen her look. The first pic is vaguely reminiscent of Rosie O'Donnell. [X17]

The "sole remaining" copy of the video of Steve Irwin's death has been handed over to his widow. [Tabloid Whore]

Nicole Richie hires a shaman to rid her home of whatever "curse" triggered her string of bad luck in 2006. This shaman will, I assume, walk in, flush thirty-six baggies of coke down the toilet, and leave. [Junkiness]

Kate Hudson and Owen Wilson's publicity train makes a stop in Splitsville. [The Bosh]

Singer/model Tyrese allegedly punched his pregnant girlfriend in the stomach. [Gabsmash]

K-Fed Now Wrestling

I've been trying to think of a joke for this, K-Fed stepping into the wrestling ring, but right now I've got nothing.

Screw it, let's just let K-Fed handle it for us:

Make all your jokes, because New Year's Day I'm the one who is going to be laughing. Oh yeah, Cena, my name is not K-Fed, it's Kevin Federline, b***h, and I want some and I'm gonna get some."

I just hope he doesn't get this Cena person pregnant.

Two Can Play at This Game

While most of the world took it for granted that K-Fed was cheating on Britney during their marriage, new rumors suggest that Brit-Brit may have been getting some on the side, too. Her alleged paramour is J.R. Rotem, who Britney definitely hooked up with after filing for divorce. Other sources say J.R. had a previous fling with none other than Paris Hilton, Britney's BFF of five minutes earlier this month, and that when Britney found out she put an end to their BFF-ship. However, Miss Hilton recently gifted Britney a $500 doggie carrying case, so these rumors may be unfounded.

In Touch Weekly reports that Britney actually called K-Fed to ask him if he'd seen the pictures of her making out with Rotem, and to brag about all the sex she was having. Kevin was furious and started screaming at her.

And, making yet another stop on her self-styled image rehabilitation tour, Britney stopped at a tattoo parlor in L.A. with her little sister to get a hand tattoo.

For real, though, she is totally fine. She has never been happier. This is all so. Much. Fun. Ain't that right, Britney?

Brit's New Man

And we begin, per usual, with the time-tested opener for Britney-related pieces: Oops! She did it again! Britney Spears is hooking up with the help. The 'razzi snapped pictures of her sucking face (while sucking a cigarette) with music producer Jonathan "J.R." Rotem. Rotem is working with Spears on her new album, and also worked with ... wait for it ... Kevin Federline, on Playing with Fire. Federline had Rotem as one of his top MySpace friends until Monday, when he was removed from the list.

This seems to be a pattern for Britney. When she and Justin Timberlake split, one billion years ago, it was widely assumed (although never confirmed by either party), that it was because she cheated on him with Wade Robson, who choreographed both her tour and *NSYNC's. So maybe Brit just has a thing for men who work for both her and her previous dudes. Because, um, I've seen pics of this Rotem kid, and I can't imagine she has a thing for his face. But whatevs.

Anyway, Rotem wasted no time in hitting up Hyde, now that he's famous and all. TMZ has video. Rock on, Britney.

Late-Night Links

Jennifer Aniston leaves an L.A. club through the back door with none other than Kevin Federline. Oh, how the mighty have fallen! [Celebitchy]

Sharon Stone outrages and offends the population of Norway. "Now you know how we feel," says the population of America. [Perez Hilton]

Pam Anderson got naked in front of a camera, because that's how she spends her time when she's not getting married impulsively. [Agent Bedhead]

Since her 2003 arrest for heroin possession, Nicole Richie has apparently lost an inch of height and five pounds. Also, she's black now. [Mollygood]

Queen Latifah and her girlfriend, trainer Jeanette Jenkins, are reportedly jogging towards splitsville. But, hey, at least she's jogging. [Bossip]

Paris and Nicky Hilton having an ass-slappin' good time in the back of a limo. [Egotastic]

Late-Night Links

The long-awaited video (seriously, it took a whole day -- that's like a lifetime in the blogosphere) of Jessica Simpson running off-stage at the Kennedy Center Awards has at last arrived. [MollyGood]

Reverend Jesse Jackson is urging the public to boycott Seinfeld DVDs after star Michael Richards' much-publicized racist rant reportedly prompted a spike in DVD sales for the show. My guess is the thought process surrounding most of these purchases went more along the lines of "Oh, hey, I forgot about Kramer. Man, Seinfeld sure was funny. Those DVDs would make a great Christmas gift," and less along the lines of "You mean that Kramer guy's a racist? Oh, now I'll buy the DVDs." A Jason Alexander crotch shot probably would have had a similar impact. But whatever. [CelebSlam]

Beyonce Knowles and Jennifer Hudson are supposedly having some manner of non-feud regarding who upstaged whom in Dreamgirls. I'm not sure if I believe it less than I care, or vice versa. [TMZ]

Porn star Kendra Jade knows words like "disheartened," "inevitable," and "salacious." That or her publicist does. Either way, she didn't sleep with K-Fed. She has standards. [JordanIsYourHomeboy]

Sandra Bullock is either pregnant or she isn't. [Celebrity Smack]

Picking up the Pieces

Things that happened today without any involvement on the part of Britney Spears' vagina:

American Idol fourth-placer Chris Daughtrey's album debuts at #2 on the U.S. charts. [Perez Hilton]

Check out Beyonce's new video for "Listen," from the Dreamgirls soundtrack. [popbytes]

Kevin Federline has a thing for women who like the whole world to see their naughty bits. Isn't that right, Kendra Jade? [Pop on the Pop]

Josh Hartnett's mystery girl revealed: she's Amber Sainsbury, who did some show called Hex for 11 episodes in 2004 and is currently co-starring with Hartnett in 30 Days of Night. Also: she's not as pretty as Josh, which is how I reckon he prefers it. [BWE]

Nick Lachey bought a minor-league baseball team this week. What did you do? [ICYDK]

Matt Lauer named his newborn son Thijs. Pronounced "Tice." I am supposed to say something mean here (preferably referencing the unfortunately named Paltrow offspring) but I have a fabulous friend at school named Tejs (pronounced similarly), so out of respect for the fact that he did my finance homework all quarter, I just have this to say: Way to name a kid, Lauer! [Cele|Bitchy]

K-Fed Has a New Lady Already?

As disturbing as this sounds, according to Dlisted, K-Fed has found himself a new lady and they spent the Thanksgiving Holiday at Miss Shar Jackson's house. You know, Shar, Kevin's other baby mama? The girl is not cute, but has that white trash big boobed thing goin on. I guess Kevin is into the porn star look, via an article almost a year ago, Kevin was rumored to have hooked up with porn star Kendra Jade. Here is another story of Kevin's rumored infidelity.

We wonder if she is one of the many reasons for the Brit/K-Fed split? Hopefully one of them will turn up on TV soon enough to tell their side of the story. Maybe K-Fed can go the Nick Lachey route and write some soulful ballads about how his heart was broken by his way-more successful wife?

I just hope Britney Spears stops hanging out with Paris soon. Otherwise Kevin is going to look like a model father and that is just tragic.

K-Fed Offered a Job!

Perhaps Mr. Britney Spears won't have to resort to selling sex tapes after all. While his soon-to-be ex-wife traverses the country on Paris Hilton's coattails, Kevin Federline has reportedly been offered nearly $300,000 to appear on the U.K.'s Celebrity Big Brother.

According to an insider, "Kevin is hugely entertaining because he takes himself really seriously - even though no one else does. He'll be great for the show because it's all about larger-than-life characters." Although Federline's "real" fans should not be counted out -- X17 snuck cameras into his recent House of Blues show, and caught Kevin leading an (unironically) cheering crowd in a chorus of -- if I'm hearing this right -- "Fuck K-Fed." I'm not sure I completely understand the context, but about halfway through the film someone holds a Long Island iced tea up in the air, and that's really all the explanation I need.

Jimmy Kimmel's K-Fed Haterade

Check out Kimmel's mucho funny Federline-drowning monologue at last night's AMAs.