Green Sex

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TV Porn

So if Network TV was a Porn here would be some must see shows:
*30 Cock
*How I Fucked Your Mother
*Studio 69 On The Sunset Strip
*Family Gay
*The Ass
*Ballville
*The Porn Adventures Old Christine
*Gays Anatomy
*The Unit (well, that actually is the name of a show but it still sounds like porn)

Please...if you have any TV Porn ideas, comment away.

Oops!...She Did it Again!

Not Britney this time.

It's MISS NEVADA!

Once again, sucking on a teat...that of a brunette girlfriend, true to form. Katie Rees issued a statement after the first set of incriminating photos surfaced stating that the photos were "an isolated incident." Maybe not so much. These pics were taken in a different location than the first set, and on a different date. Not that there's anything wrong with that, Katie. The guys (and girls) looking on appear to be enjoying it quite a bit. Since this whole beauty queen thing isn't working out for you, Kates, maybe you should try your hand at porn queen. You seem to come with plenty of experience.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! THE PICS OF MISS NEVADA ARE BACK!!!

She's the one in red. TMZ ran them today, so I suppose they're fair game again (yes, Chris, I'll pull them again if you'd like). There are about a million more here. Consider this a Christmas gift from The Evil Beet (and Splash News) to you.

Um...There Were More Britney Crotch Shots...

Sorry for the vaginas on the front page, but, um, wow. Just wow. HEL-LO VAGINA!

Update: Pictures censored now. Click on the photos for the uncensored version.

The Happiest Porn You Will Ever See

I don't really understand what this is advertising...It looks like a mix of "do you want a little sucky sucky?" and some Saturday morning kids TV show? The Japanese are funny, that is all I know.

HOORAY PORN!!!

We've got a lot of good stuff for you today, kids:

The Mischa Barton nude scene video.

Paris Hilton's breast.

And what week would be complete without Lindsay Lohan's vagina?

Don't say I don't love you guys.

Kim Cattrall is Dating Herself

Because no woman in this city under age 40 has that much pubic hair. It's just not how we roll in Hell-Ay.

Check it out (uncensored).

(Yeah, I'm not running porn on the front page anymore. At least not this week. Damn the man.)

Happy Slow News Week to You, Too!

Slowest. News week. Ever. So, celeb gossip bloggers have taken to their favorite slow-news-week activity: posting outtakes and best-takes from celeb photo shoots. Check out some of my favorites, and pray that someone finally snaps that pic of Paris Hilton doing what she does best in the bathroom at Hyde next week.

Shakira at the Latin Grammys [Teddy and Moo]

Kristen Bell in Giant magazine. [HGW]

Paris Hilton in Seventeen. [MollyGood]

Celeb candids [celebrity nation]

Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony at a Latin Recording Academy event. [YBNBY]

Brangelina and Maddox in India. [Hollyscoop]

Grey's star Ellen Pompeo on Friends, Kate Walsh by Roberto D'Este [HGW, more]

And, finally, a celeb nipple slip compilation video. [Celebrity Pictorials]

The Ultimate iPod Accessory

Christmas is right around the corner. But why wait? Get one of these for your loved ones today. After all, Kevin Federline's album comes out on Tuesday.


[Thanks to Just *dot* Christina for the tip. Er, I mean, for the heads-up. Shit. No. Thanks for the penis. Wait. Grr.]

Gonna Catch You Ridin' Dirty

I don't know if she is naked. I don't know if they are doin' something nasty. Use your imagination.

Thanks [Mclady Celebrities] for the hot pics. There are more where that came from...

Kate Moss Topless and Dancing

While you all are hard at work solving my movie puzzle, you might want to take a short break to relax, have a cup of coffee, and check out Kate Moss topless and dancing. It's mesmerizing, really.

Kiddie Porn or Child Models?

There's been quite a bit of discussion on the interwebs lately about this model at the Ashley Paige show at L.A. Fashion Week. Such a young girl in such a small bikini. People want to know what on earth her mother was thinking. I agree! I mean, if my six-year-old daughter was offered the opportunity to walk a fashion week runway in a barely-there bikini, I'd make damn sure she didn't have any tan lines!

Rick Salomon and Eve?

In Touch magazine is reporting that Rick Salomon and rapper Eve were spotted getting cozy at Hyde nightclub. Is the infamous Eiffel-towered star of One Night in Paris planning to title his sequel Summer's Eve? Or perhaps Paris Hilton's former boyfriend has finally found a starlet willing to insert a liquor bottle into her lady parts while being videotaped, an area in which Paris was a grave disappointment. Eve does have a history of sex toys and videotape. Regardless of their individual rationales, rest assured that the real loser here is you, as you're sure to be up all night, engaged in a Jacobian wrestling match with the God of your personal allegiances, struggling to determine which of them you actually care less about.



[via Bossip]

Amber Tamblyn Nip Slip

Where's your God now, Joan of Arcadia?

Get the uncensored versions here and here.

There is a Human Penis on a Dog in an Ikea Ad

Those wacky Swedes!

[via MollyGood]

Cameron Diaz Nip Slip

Get the uncensored version here. See what happens when you try to have the 'razzi charged with assualt, Cam? YOUR TIT ENDS UP ON THE INTERNET. Did you learn your lesson?

Lunchtime Quickies: Nick Carter Would Like You to Hate Paris Hilton, Watch His Television Program

• God bless the British press. They've got a pic of cocaine in its natural habitat -- the inside of Kate Moss's nose.


• If the standard blow-up doll isn't doing the trick anymore, you can bid on an actual Fembot on eBay.


• Nick Carter: "Paris Hilton is a psychotic evil whore blah blah blah blah hey by the way I have a television show coming out."


• Jamie Pressly gets engaged and Kate Hudson files for divorce.


• Do you want a George W. Bush butt plug? Perhaps for use in conjunction with your Fembot? Okay, okay. Just promise you'll think about it.


• ABC's website has a clip of the Terri Irwin interview that will air on 20/20 tonight.


• I can't believe I am linking to Perez Hilton just because I agree with his taste, but I am. Regina Spektor rocks, and when you're done listening to the new Killers album, you should check her out.


• Lost star Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje ayddibug ukilolopoti yi Abptu daka-daka shrekpiti.

Jessica Biel is Kissing a Girl

I'm pretty busy today, so posting may be slow, but I figure this'll keep you guys entertained for at least the next couple of hours. Thank you, Jessica Biel; in your desperation, I find hope.

BREAKING: Tom Cruise Still Gay

Yes, folks, it's that time of year again! A male prostitute claims to have had a gay dalliance with Tom Cruise! And someone is using it to try to sell a book! Hollywood Interrupted was "leaked" a chapter. In it, "Big Red" talks about his sexual misadventures with Tom Cruise during the filming of Eyes Wide Shut, as well as his rendezvous with other big name stars. It's definitely not a PG read, and it's not in line to win either a Pulitzer or a spelling bee, but please, please try to hang in there until Red deftly compares anal intercourse with Garth Brooks to "fucking a whale." Because, you know, how funny is that?